Every time Luca said he wanted to learn to surf but we always spent most of the time in Ubud, a village in the hills, and worked.

And the, back in Bangkok, he always complained that he could not surf in Bali.

This time, after spending almost one year in Italy, we planned to come back again and this time Luca was really determined to surf.

So, we rented a house for 4 months in Balangan, just 4 km from the beautiful Balangan beach.

Yesterday we went with Paolo and Valeria to Kuta to buy surfboards.
I don’t know anything about surf, so I was surprised to learn that the size and shape of the table depends on the surfer.

It took a few hours walking around the streets of Kuta and visiting many shops but finally we got two second hand surfboards for Luca and Valeria.
Luca paid about 120 euro for his board.

This morning we woke up at 6:30 for the first day surfing, but it started to rain heavily so we had to wait.
When the rain stopped we met Paolo and Valeria and went to Seminyak, a beach not far from Kuta.

There I saw many surfers who follow their dream, with the surfboard sliding on the waves, looking happy to do what they love.
Then I looked at Luca who was trying to get on the board and catch a wave.
He did so many times, and many times he fell, but he didn’t give up.

Of course I can’t compare him with the experienced surfers out there, but I wish he could be like them soon.

Before, when I saw people surfing on TV, I had the impression that it was an easy sport, because they looked so light and fast on the waves.
I thought that anybody who can swim, can easily surf too.

But today, when I saw Luca in the sea, I changed my mind, and understood it takes time and passion to be able to fly on the waves.

Luca today could not stand but I think he will do it one day.
Before I didn’t understand why he wanted to surf, but now I do.

It doesn’t even matter if  he will learn to surf or not.
What matters is that he is doing what he likes, as the real happiness is in trying to fulfill his dreams.

We travelled for 8 hours in the Nakhonchai Air Bus on the way they served snack , drink, milk, rice and cold napkins included in the price .

We arrived in Ubon Ratchathani in the early morning.
Me and Luca were very tired but luckily the Sri – Isan hotel where we stay has free Wi-Fi, so we can relax and work in the room.
This time we plan to visit southern of Laos.
I was thinking that we where going to Pakse, but Luca actually would love to go to visit Savannakhet, so we decided to call Ubon Ratchathani Bus Station ( Tel.045-312773) to check the bus to Mukdaharn, the border and then go to Savannakhet.
In the morning we take a tuk tuk (100 Bath) from the hotel to the Ubon Ratchathani bus station.
If you want to save you can take a Song Teaw (blue public car) number 11 from the main street but I am not sure how much.
When we arrived there, many ticket men come to me and Luca and said “Go Laos, Pakse”.
I said back to them “Mai Kha, Ja Pai Maukdaharn, kob khun kha” (“No Thank, I will go to Mukdaharn). I was looking for Sahamit Tour ( if you are in Ubon Ratchathani you can call to check the time here : Tel 045-285780) then we catched the air condition bus on 9.30 am to Mukdaharn (the price is 135 bath each).

It took almost 3 hours and we arrived to Makdaharn bus station. When I getting off the driver of the bus tell me to go to buy a bus ticket to Savannakhet with Bus Company 99 (In Thai said Borlisad Konsong 99), the price is 50 bath each and they need to see your passport.

So in about 1 hour we are arrived to the Savannakhet bus station, then we took Tuk Tuk again to “Saisouk Guest House” (Phetsalad rd. Thahae Village, Kaysone Phomvihanh Dist. Tel. +856(41)212207) in the city centre. The Tuk Tuk charged us 40 bath each (10.000 kip each).

The Guest House has two floors. The ground floor is made from cement mixed with wood and on second floor where is the room it is completely made from wood, a part from a living room for laying down made from cement and a space for cleaning and hang your cloht for free. (because you clean by your self).
There are 3 kinds of rooms: aircondition or fan with private bathroom, room with fan with share bathroom, 11 rooms in total.

We took a room with private bathroom with air condition and fan because Luca sweats easily, for 60,000 Kip (240 bath 5 euro) .

The guest house is not far from main road and have many restaurants around the area.

The owner of the guest house is friendly and kind with a big smile while you ask her information. Do not worry, she can speak English because this guest house has already been open for 6 years. The house before belongning of her father but now it’s her and her husband’s.

The house is big because her family was 11 person, now some married and some are working in another place. Also her father and mother moved to Vientiane and have a new house there.

We don’t know yet how long we will stay here but for sure I feel safe and feel as like home here in “Saisouk Guest House”.

The owner said “price is fix for now but it can change depending on  the economy”.

If somebody likes quiet and wants to feel as staying in a real home, I recommend you to visit here.

If then you decide not to stay, the lady will not complain but you may like as much as I do.

Sawasdee Kha

Lek

Why I said “kòp koon kha” (Thai Word ) to Uncle who I was talking to in Laos.

Because in Thailand…

if somebody is older than you , you say “thank you ” to you he/she will say “kòp jai” this is polite and right in Thailand as like as “kòp koon” .

If somebody says “Thank You” to their friend they can say”kòp koon“or” kòp jai” , this is right too.

If somebody says “Thank You” to someone they respect or older than them they will use “kop koon” or “kòp prá koon” not use “ kòp jai“.

All “kòp koon” must be followed by “kha” (lady) “kráp“ (man) to speak with an older person than you.

Or “na” and “ja” then with/without your name ; “na Lek” or “ja Lek” to speak with your friend.

Or ” ja” with name or without name for older person speaking to a young person kindly.

So “na” or “ja” it’s like “kha” or “ kráp” but use in different satiation.

All this is, as everything in Thailand, not very standardized and you’ll find somebody telling you this is not 100% exact.

This is to be more polite and when people hear they will know that you are happy to say that.

So I don’t use “ kòp jai” (Thank You in Laos ) to uncle because he is older than me and that sounds not polite to me, even if I know that it is not in Laos, so I said “kòp koon (kha)” ( Thank You in Thai) instead.

I know somebody thinks I am wrong because I must say “Thank You ( kòp jai)” in Laos but if I feel that is not right because It might have another word to say “Thank You” to someone older than you so I don’t know another polite word in Laos to use.

Well, I decided to use a polite word in Thai.

I think whatever language you use it’s not important but it’s very important how your behaviour is and how you make that person know that you are happy for his help, by a respectfull “Thank You” which is a safe word when you are not sure.

But when someone can’t speak he has other ways to show you to make you understand.

That’s because we are human, we have eyes to see and show our feelings, ears to hear, legs to walk, hands to do things and pray, a brain to think, but this is not enough for us yet because we must have an open heart.

For what? To understand the feeling of the people around you.

Sawadee Kha

Lek

we have to go to work at the internet shop before they close at 10.00 p.m.

The first night and many nights in Luang Prabang I always saw saam naehn (Buddhist novice or monk below the age of twenty) in the internet shop.

I feel wondering and think how is it possible that they are there.
Because I know that in the night time monks or saam naehn (novitiate; novice monk) have to stay in the temple, they can’t walk around outside.
Every Buddhist knows this rule and walking outside like this I’ve never seen in Thailand.
Maybe because they are just saam naehn, not monks yet, that’s why people here do not look surprised.
Also everything has changed in this world, so maybe the saam naehn just come here to have access to a more global technology, the internet.

I saw they chat and some wrote e-mails or go around web-sites.
I might not be polite to look at what they do but I did it because I am really curious.
Anyway I try not to stay too near in sign of respect even if they are not monks yet, but anyway they are in the jee waawn (a Buddhist monk’s robe) and do a religious duty learning the Lord Buddha’s teachings, morals and ethics; the good and decent principles of life.
For that reason ladies can’t touch the monk or saam naehn and they can’t touch the ladies neither.

One day, early in morning, at around 6.30 am me and Luca woke up because we wanted to take photos of monks and saam naehn, who come to receive food offerings (or in thai: bin-tá-bàat).
I want to present food (tak- baat) to those Monks and Saam Naehn so we get ready and go to wait on the street.
When I am in front of the guest house many Laos lady come to me and offer me sticky rice for present to Monks.
They start offering it to me and of course it is more expensive than in the market or cooking by yourself, but I have no choice because I do not have kitchen in the guest house so I intended to buy, but then Luca said to me:
“Lek , Don’t buy rice from them” .
I am looking at him and start feeling bad because I wanted to do it today but he said “No” to me and that is bad sign for me.
Then he starts explain “Did you see the notice on the guest house yesterday, it said not to support or buy food on the street from those lady because they are spoiling the real meaning of the alms donations”.
I answered:
“Yes, I know but we can’t cook and we have to buy anyway. If we ask somebody to cook for us well we have to pay anyway”.

For me it’s not because of money if you want to present food to Monk but the important thing is to do it by pure heart .
Because I believe that when I die then a good things I do in this life will help me to go to heaven or reborn in a good form.
I learn this from my family, we believe also to cook by ourselves and go to the temple.
Because the food we offer to the monks must be clean, you should keep it in a high place, not on the floor, and that food should not be part of your own food but bought and cooked especially for them.

Because of nowadays our life is always in a rush so in Bangkok if we have no time we can buy rice and food on the street and present it to the monks when they pass in the morning.

So the food must be clean, new and ,important, you present it to the Monk by your pure heart.

Anyway after I explain to Luca I hope he understands me because his idea is “Don’t buy food from the lady on street as it’s not a good way because it’s a business and bad for their tradition“.

So I do without rice but with the canned food I carry it from Bangkok. I feel more peace and happy when I am done with my offering.
Then I stand to look at the many people presenting food to the Monks”.

On the way back to the guest house we visited one temple and I found an old man working.
He was painting the door of the temple, so I start asking him:
“Uncle,Why are there so many temple in Luang Prabang ?”.
(If I don’t know somebody’s name, I guess how old they are and call them like Sister,Brother or Uncle or Aunty….).
He said to me “Because before (around 100 – 200 year ago) in Luang Prabang we have Jhao-Mueng (the appointee of the King for the province).
He liked to present food or offers to the monks, and he ordered that every village must have at least 3-5 temples”.
So I continue and asked him more.
“Why people here tak- baat (present food) to monk only sticky rice?”.
I ask because I saw people here put only rice in the baat (the bowl carried by a Buddhist monk).
He answered to me.
“When the monk and saam naehn come back to the temple from bin-tá-bàat (alms) they will find some village people who brought different kinds of food direclty there, so that the monks can have also other kinds of food, not only sticky rice” .
I feel that is right because in Thailand we also have two choices: present food to monk on the street or bring the food to temple.
But in Thailand we also put rice and food together in the baat while here they put only rice and instant noodle or canned food.

Well I have asked my last question to him because I disturbed him too long already.
“Why here many saam naehn (novitiate; novice monk)?”.
He said.
“Because they come from many places in Laos for study and education”.
Yes I forgot this is. In Thailand we have the same but some come to be monks or saam naehn and some just to stay in the temple and help monks.
Well I left Uncle saying “ kòp koon kha” (Thank You) to him.

One thing I see is that there are many tourist ladies who come to take a picture when the monk walk while the people present the rice.
For them it is amazing and they enjoy to see it, as much as I do.
It’s amazing and happy to see and come to Luang Prabang , but I keep that happiness in my heart and stand far from those monk for respect.

I know I have no right to blame those tourists ladies.
Probably nobody told them that when the monk walk past, they should stay far, but they stand very near to take a photo, for a good shot and without knowing the rule or culture.

Normally when we talking to the monks or stay near them we are sitting and joining hands in sign of respect.

So I hope if somebody reads my blog and would love to visit to Luang Prabang remembers this:
If you are a lady please stand far from the monks for respect.
By the way without knowing nobody is guilty, but if you know it and do it, you are.
Think! That if you do as you please without respect, you harm the very culture you have come to enjoy.

Sawasdee Kha

Lek

I wish and dream maybe it’s might possible if I will have chance to see Venice in real even if alone one day.
(Before I had the idea to apply for a job with a cruise boat around the world and they give a good salary too. But because of my family was worried and I have to pay the agency for the ticket, I drop my dream and decided to just work to save money first and I always said soon but it’s never soon, till I met Luca).
Now I come here with Luca and it’ better than in my dreams.

Luca drove the car and we park beside the road on the way and get the bus to Venice.
Luca told me he can’t drive car to Venice because parking is very expensive.
We get on the bus and I feel somebody looking at me, not because I look strange but because how I dress.
Since it’s so cold for me so Papa gave Mama’s winter coat, but It it’s for the snow, that’s why people look at me.

The bus crosses the bridge and I see Venice on the opposite side. It looks like a island on the sea.
We get off the bus and start walking..
It’s crowded, school boy and girls wearing a fantasy hat, many tourists and lovers but I am really happy because I saw a Thai mother and her daughter too.
(I am happy because I heard her speak Thai language with her daughter and I feel not alone as here there are Thai people too, because it very rear to find Italian people in Luca’s town speak English language so sometime I feel alone, but not much).

In Venice there are many shops selling different things and many restaurants but expensive for me compare in Thai Bath so I keep my stomach to eat when we go back home with Papa’.
But I love ice cream very much in Italy so I never forget to buy one scoop and enjoy it while walking , taking some photos and see the shops.
I am looking for something to remember here so I pass several shops then I buy 2 key holders, not expensive within my budget.

There are many churches in Venice but it’s not just the building but also the spirit of faith which makes them look strong.

In the church many people stay inside with a quiet not like outside with many noisy people talking and laughing happily.

The houses and palaces are old and have their style but seeing the reflection in the water makes them move and be alive.

Some people choose to hide from the crowd and sunshine so they stay in the gondola in the small canals, where the buildings on both sides give shadow. They enjoy the beautiful view and listen to love songs.

For me Venice that day is a fantastic place and more beautiful that I was thinking.
It’s like magic and you are walking and crossing many bridges and if you are tired Venice gives you more energy.
Whatever you are looking at, you will loose yourself in it.
This is Venice for me: a city of romance with feelings of love and songs.

Sawasdee Kha

Lek

That night we went to bed so early because we were very tired.But around 5 am I can’t sleep anymore because it’s 11 am. in Thailand.
So I ask myself what I have to do. Then I decided to wake up and go to clean in the living room to kill the time.

Because I can’t find mob so I clean the floor by cloth in my hand till at 7.30 Papa Luca wake up and saw me with surprise and said “Tu (you) why I don’t use mop” (using his hands to show).

I forget to tell you that Luca’s Father can speak English very little.
I am a bit afraid that he will be angry but I really can’t sleep and I just look for something to do and this is the only thing I can do now.
So I tell him “I can’t sleep” but he don’t understand then I put a hand near my cheek to show what I mean.
I really can’t sleep well.
It’s because of cold weather and change time and the place.
So for the whole next week I always wake up early.
Luca’s father doesn’t like to change food and every morning he and Luca will have only coffee, but I can’t.

So I cook rice and stir fried vegetable (I bring Thai sauce from Thailand too) and he looks at me and asks:
- “Tu, no bread.”
I said:
- ” No, Thanks, in my home we eat rice in the morning, lunch and dinner”.
I open the dictionary and find the Italian word if he doesn’t understand.
Papa looks at me and laughs at me because he thinks in Thailand we are crazy because people eat rice 3 time per day.(Luca explain me).
The way he said makes me understand he doesn’t look down on me but he just don’t know why I have rice every meal.

I stay almost one week there before get travel to south of Italy until Sicily for 15 days.
So everyday I do a house work there and Papa says “Don’t do because you have come to holiday”.
For me I think it’s bad if I come and just sleep without help, so I told Papa it’s o.k. because I do working hard in the Hotel everyday.
So Papa smile.
And one day after I finished to wash the dishes Papa asks me:
- “Tu, like eat Buffalo?” putting his finger from two hand to show horns.
I answer:
- “No Papa”.
He asks Luca if it is true that I don’t eat buffalo, then Luca said “Yes” and I told Luca to explain Papa why I don’t eat Buffalo or beef.

It’s because one day when I was 10 years old. my father called me and said to me “Can you stop to eat Buffalo” I asking “Why?”.
Because Buffalo making rice for us and working hard and pity when be killed it have tears as like their know they will die.
Yes, I think my father is right because one day when I went to north east Thailand for give money to temple, people killed a buffalo for cooking and treat guests.
I walked and saw they cut the meat and I walked more an I found the head of that buffalo with open eyes and tears.

So that’s why I stopped, and I never eat it again.

Well Papa asking me again “Tu, do you like pollo (chicken)” I am confused but Papa continues with body language and make a hand up and down like bird who flies.
So I said “Chicken” then he said “No” then I guess “Bird (pigeon)” then I think he tired so he asks Luca “How to say ‘pollo’ in English”
Luca answer “Chicken” then he tell me and I said “Yes”.
Now Papa smile and point his hand up so I guess and said “Tomorrow”.
He nod his head and said “Yes, To-mo-rrow”.

I am very happy that he will cook something for me.
But more than anything when I stay with him or when I help him cooking I always got a new Italian word.
(because me and Luca we use English language).

One day again I saw Papa sitting reading a book in the balcony with a T-Shirt without sleeves so I am afraid he will get fever.
I decided to call him and asking him “Papa are you cold?”. He doesn’t understand me so I make my body shake and hug my arms to show him what I mean.
Well he laugh at me and said “Freddo” and he said “No freddo” and smile.
So I got one more word again.
And he asks me back:
– “Tu, freddo?”.
I say “yes, very freddo papa” and he laughs.

Papa is someone I can talk to because Luca is working online.
So everyday when I want to speak with Papa something if he doesn’t understand on the table in the kitchen I have my best friend: an Italian dictionary.

Because of this Papa and me understand each other.
I know Papa never get bore to help me to find a word and teach me a little word per day.
And I hope one day I can speak to him without dictionary in my hand and that will be a wonderful day for me.

Sawasdee Kha Or Ciao.

Lek

It’s not Thai language, it’s a French channel, anyway I still keep my eyes on it.
The program is showing about Pakistan marriage life.
I don’t understand what they are talking but, from the video I can feel what they want to show.
I saw the lady cry, I know only that if you are not really sad it’s not possible to have those tears.
I think maybe her life after married is not as she expected.

This reminds me about my Indian friend in Gokarna (India in November 2006).

She is a good hearted lady aged 27 years old with a 4 years old son.
Her name is Panlavee and her son’s name is Patika.
She is the sister in law of a big family in the village (9 persons).
Everyday I visit her and her mother-in-law (I call her “Aunty”) at home after I went back from the market.
They always do house work, but this is never a problem and they have time to talk to me.

Everyday we always start by a new topic and one day we start about marriage.
She said Luca’s my good choice. I know she means money and status. I answer suddenly and explain “No”.
He is not my choice but he is someone I love and he loves me so we decided to be together and learn each other.

I remember Panlavee and Auntie look at me and their face showing the question mark(?).
Maybe they want to know why my family is o.k with this.
I explain my culture and tradition.
I can love someone but if my family doesn’t like him it’s also a big problem.
So I think I am same with them just I have the chance to be with someone I love.
But for them they can love someone but it’s doesn’t mean they will always have chance to stay with the man they love.
(I am talking about Indian lady and her family in the village not in Bombay or a modern Indian life style).

After my explanation I ask Panlavee back:
“Is it true that in India the man will choose the lady to marry, and the lady can’t refuse even if there is no love?”
( I know because I watched many Indian movies).

She looked at me and said: “Yes”.
She told me that her husband choose her from many pictures of Indian ladies.
She go to take the picture of her wedding party to show me.
In the meantime her husband come back from outside so he comes to join us and tell me the story:
“My mom showed me many Indian lady’s pictures. I look, then I point my hand to Panlavee’s picture. Then my mother goes to her house and tell them that I choose her.
Then we married.”
So I ask Panlavee:
“So did you go out to have dinner with him before marriage?”.
“No” she answered me quickly.
“So how you will know how the man who choose you looks like?”
I feel curious.
“I saw his picture too and my husband come to my house 2 days after he choose me and we engaged. And the next day we got married” Panlavee said.
“It means you saw him very few times before that”, I said.

“Yes, on the date when we engaged, for a few hours, and again the day of the marriage” she answered me.
So I ask Panlavee’s husband “So you feel you like her when you saw her picture, right?”
He said:
“Yes, I like her when I saw her picture and I trust my mother because she chose all the lady’s pictures before showing me”
Well, I turn my face and call “Aunty, how do you find a girl for him? Where did you take the picture of those ladies from?”.
Many questions come out from my mind I really want to know how is it.

“I know they are from my daughter’s friend’s family or my cousin’s daughter” Aunty answers me.
“It means all those ladies, you know them?” I ask again.
“Yes” Aunty answered me.
“So how you know those ladies are good persons” I ask again because I am wondering.
“I decided by their family. If their parents are good, it means the daughter is good too” Aunty explains.
I start thinking about her idea same as my parent idea too.

“I married with my husband because he choose me, he is older than me 15 years old”, Aunty says.
“So do you have feeling of love?” I still want to know how she feels.
“First no, but later you will love each other. You can see I stay with him till now and he is a good man” Aunty smile and a bit laughing maybe because of my question.
So I turn the same question to Panlavee.
She also smiles before answer “Yes, I like my husband when I saw his picture at the first time too”.

Finished her answer I start thinking yes, that can happen without knowing as we call

“love at first sight”.

Maybe this is the indian way to make people use their senses, and they believe God created their soul mate somewhere.
I think many people believe like that, me too.

For 1 month I met Panlavee I know she is a good girl with respect for love.
Sometime I can see from Panlavee’s eyes that she is not happy.
I think maybe it’s not because of her married life but it might be missing freedom.
Because every time when I talk about my life as I work and I travel with Luca.
She told me that is great and that she I would lo

ve to get a job too.

But in her town they don’t give a job for a lady apart for some kinds of jobs such as nurse or teacher.

Now I found it’s not because how she married that makes us different but the level of

freedom we have.

In India men work outside and the women do housework. Even sawing or cutting cloth it’s not a job for a lady in Gokarna. It’s outside so is for a man.

I can say I am lucky not because I have chance to stay with someone I love.
But I am lucky to have freedom to do what I like. (if that thing does not make my par

ents cry).

I don’t think their culture is wrong because 50 year ago in Thailand we also did the same.
But now we change because ladies are stronger.
I don’t mean Indians ladies are not strong because they still have this style of marriage.
But if you understand and think well you will see their culture is not strange even if at first you feel it.
It’s just for safety, and their parents want to be sure that their children are happy with the right person.
That is from parent’s love and it can happen everywhere.
I think this is not like love yet, but it can be love because love doesn’t mean you choose or I choose but Love means many things.
It’s up to you to give it a meaning.
Sadness or Happiness can happen in everyone’s married life, not because other people hurt you but because you choose to be happy or sad.

As long as we learn to trust each other by pure heart, then the real love is not hard to find.

In Asian culture it’s very important to meet the family of your boyfriend, because if Luca’s family doesn’t like me it means everything is difficult in the future.
It’s not a kind of joke, but we believe it and my family is very serious about it.

I still remember what happen with my mother. She had an unhappy life because my mother is poor and my father’s family never loved her.
But she is lucky because my father loved her but that is still not enough to be accepted by the family.
It’s not just only Luca’s family but his friends also are very important, because I am Asian and maybe they don’t like me.

I am lucky because the first people that I will meet are Luca ’s friend from the tripcentre meeting (travelers’s meeting).

I got more nervous when we arrived to Luca’s friend house.
Luca told me the owners are a nice couple, Marco and Laura.
That time I was getting even more worried so I didn’t hear what he said actually.
I don’t know how I will greet them by using their way or my own Thai way. So I think I will do both ways.

Getting off the car I saw a lovely house surrounded by mountains, houses and a big lake.
The weather very cold for me, not like Luca always told me on the phone “it’s warm”, but maybe it’s warm for him, not for me.

So, I saw an Italian couple and Luca introduces me to them:
“Lek these are the owners of the house Laura and Marco“.
After finish Luca’s voice I feel very shame and I forgot to do the way I plan before and I said “Sawasdee Kha” by low voice then followed by “Ciao” and I give the hand to them. The lady, Laura, comes to me and hug me and kiss me on the left and right cheek.

I feel really shy and said to myself “It’s normal and it’s not polite if you not give them hug or kiss” so I think I will feel used to it soon.
Laura and Marco give me a big smile and let me choose the room for my own.
I feel more relaxed and very happy to meet them.

In the meeting. I met many Luca’s friends but I don’t understand what they say because I cannot speak Italian so I cooked Thai food for almost 20 persons and I made steam rice.
It did not come out well so I was very sad but Laura said to me “It is o.k. Lek nobody know how is Thai rice cooking style actually”.
I am looking at her and I am smile because she does not blame me but she’s very kind to me.
When the people eat they were happy with Thai Food and for sure I was happy too.

My father always teach me when you are somebody’s guest, don’t just be lazy but help them to clean or whatever you can do for them.
So I start to help them wash dishes even if Laura and Marco said to me “It’s fine and you are my guest, please don’t do it” but I continue and I never forget what happen in their new house I used to much water then make their toilet unusable as the pipe is broken.

I feel really sad as I just want to help but I broke it.
I said sorry to Laura and Marco but the answer I get back is “Lek it’s fine don’t worry, I can fit it with a smile” so it’s my first couple of days in Italy with Italian people and I will never forget the friendship they are giving to me…

Sawasdee Kha.

Lek.

You can see the pictures of the Tripcentre’s meeting here

A week ago in Gili Trawangan Luca had an idea to go to Gili Meno by canoe.
First, I am silent, then I said yes, but if we can find a canoe for 2 persons.
The next morning we were walking and looking for the canoe but we couldn’t find it.
Luca was looking at me and said “Lek, let’s try one each, if you can’t do, just tell me”.
I can do it. I can do it. I keep telling my self after I hear that sentence.
My heart start feeling fear but I said to myself “I must try it maybe I can do it”.

I am afraid of the water because I can’t swim and many years ago, when I was 17 years old, I was sinking in the water two times in the same year.
After that I am afraid to go in the deep water. If I feel my feet don’t touch the sand I will never go in the water

This time I was thinking that maybe I might be lucky if I can do it, so finally I can win my fear.
So we go.
I try first to keep the canoe near the beach for feel of safety and then let it far and far, step by step.

We agree to try to go to Gili Meno and Luca ’s canoe stay beside me to make me feel safe.

We were almost half way to Gili Meno.
In front of me I see the strong wave move around like circle and I am looking to the water: it’s very deep and blue now.
I started calling Luca loud “Luca I fear..I fear I can’t do it, let’s go back now”.
Luca said to me “o.k. we go back slowly don’t feel fear”.
I turned back to the beach of Gili Trawangan suddenly and I go fast.

When I arrived to the beach of Gili Tarwangan I looked at the distance to Gili Meno.
I feel stupid, but at least I tried to do it and I almost can.
I though if I can do so I will win my fear but it would be more nice if I not have any fear in my heart and I do it because I am happy to do it and I enjoy.

I though there are many people who try to win the nature by climbing the high mountain , by deep diving, surfing or many ways, because they want to prove to themself that they can do it and make people remember them.
Many people are the winners but many people leave someone behind with a sad story.
I might say the nature is a strong power and we are slave of it.
Because we are humans and the nature made us with different color or different shape depending on the place we stay.
As long as we are humans we still learn and try to win the nature, but believe me you never want to win the nature but actually you want to win the fear in your heart.
This is what I tried and I will try it again one day!

Sawasdee Kha!

Lek